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All the Dirt

Tha's Fit to Print

Time for some good old fashion gossip from that zany world of paddlers:

What certain small-city bumpkin, know as the Baraboo Blogger, has taken years of paddling experience and turned it into a debauchery of death-defying behavior...and nearly causing an international incident on top of it all? Not one to kiss and tell, we'll invite you to simply click on the link, an open invitation to his personal diary (a Silbs exclusive find...but I digress) and follow his devil-may-care antics for yourself. Just a reminder, Baraboo Blogger, we don't paddle soused, and we take a spare paddle with us...the main paddle just might break. Let's move on.

In a boorish act of bad behavior and equally poor taste, Bubba (as we will call him here to protect his family), the bearded paddler, has been seen gallivanting around the capitol city of Madison with young ingenues. This old rake, a family man at that, was unabashed as he acted out before our cameras. He leaves at home a lovely wife of impeccable behavior, sophisticated taste(except in husbands) and so-far infinite tolerance.

Need I remind readers that our exlusive buy-us-at-the-check-out-counter expose had caught this man in a similar act just a few weeks ago? And where did this take place? In the capitol city of Madison, of course. It would seem that our man-in-need-of-a-paddle-leash is out of control.

Our sources tell Silbs Says that, from now on, state troopers will be alerted to stop and turn back any white van with three kayak racks headed west on I-94.

That's it for now. Mean while, stay home with your family, behave and...

Paddle safe...

DS